Be part of my "Ride for the Cure"

 

Dear friend, 

This year I will be riding in my third VeloSano "Ride for the cure" 200-mile bike ride. As I cross paths with friends old and new like so many of you, we see those fighting Cancer. It is a tough battle. Treatment cannot be understood without experiencing it either as a patient or a supporter. Despite so many facing these challenges we are making progress. This is a challenge we can overcome.

Paul Dolan and Stewart Kohl do so much to support this race. Due to their generosity, every dollar raised to support this race goes to fight Cancer. They underwrite the costs (with very generous sponsors) of 100% of the ride's costs. Their commitment is over the top. Last year the ride raised over $3 million dollars and in the last three years over $8 million. I have met some of the doctors and researchers receiving funding at the Cleveland Clinic. They are making progress.

Last year, Bobbi Sweet one of the dearest ladies I ever met, succumbed to Mesothelioma. I dedicate the ride to Bobbi, Doreen Stark who is now two years clean and Liz, my daughter, who is celebrating three years cancer free after a golf ball tumor was removed next to her brain. Survivors Dave Emerson (cousin) and Marilyn Dickey (aunt) were part of my inspiration. Last year I asked donors to add to my list to ride for when making donations. Over a dozen added family and friends. This year I will again add to "The Wall" those that you ask me to include. It still affects to many people. For two days and months of training as I struggle in this ride, it is these people and stories that I learn about each year, that gets me thru the ride. The hills and distance are a challenge. But this fight, like those that take on Cancer, is a war worth fighting. Velosano is making a difference!

I appreciate so much those supported me last year and previously given to my ride and other Velosano riders.  Velosano and the Cleveland Clinic are in pursuit to finding cures for the many ways in which cancer afflicts us. 

There remains much more work to do. That is my motivation, knowing that many of the current treatments did not even exist five years ago. Cancer survivors and fighters ride and volunteer, offering so much support during the race.

I ask for your support as I look to attack the ride with the same motivation as those that fight and those that survive. I hope you will consider sponsoring my ride with a mile match or whatever you can do to support the Cure.  Any amount makes a difference. 

Please go to link below to support my ride. I am riding with The Cleveland Indians team this year. Their commitment is over the top. Your gift is 100% tax deductible.

Thanks for your consideration.

 Sincerely,

Tom Roulston

 

Click here to donate https://goo.gl/9hjm3w

The Millennials, like past generations, reflect the homes they grew up in

In a world where companies are challenged in finding strong employee applicants, many employers cite younger applicants as lacking strong Life Skills. The generational comparison is usually connected to the cause blaming college preparation and "those devices".  Due to tuition inflation colleges in particular have become the "fall guy". The argument for what is paid in tuition there should be an expectation of college preparation ignores the historic and cultural value of college. Yes, college is coincidental with the maturing of a student's life skills.  But this is not the legacy role of academic institutions. Asking the scholar culture to teach personality skills is no different than asking a science professor to teach English.

Colleges were created for the aristocracy to teach academic skills to their children. It was an elite privilege. The Industrial age demanded more candidates with specialized skills and the post WWII era further expanded college populations as women entered the workforce. Throughout this century of college student demand growth, the academic mission remained very similar and course offerings broadened primarily along academic boundaries. Primarily in the last few decades, the curriculum expanded outside of specialized degrees (Law, Medicine, Engineering etc.) to added career focused studies.

Students develop social and life skills in their formative first 18 years not because it is part of their course load at a University. The social and cultural environment on campuses are petri dishes for development of these skills. The teaching of Life Skills comes from parents with help from academic role models. Parents teach discipline. Parents put the guard rails on behavior and shared experiences with their offspring as examples of acceptable and appreciated courtesy and skill sets. These are taught throughout all the formative years in every culture by parents. The thought that 18 years after parents have provided this role and that this responsibility shifts to academic institutions just because of their proximity to students is redefining the college mission. The reason that many students do not possess these skills is more as a result of parents vacating their role.

There are reasons why it is different in the 21st Century to raise children. Technology alone has changed playtime as well as social development in many ways. But more impactful has been the role of parents. Today with more than 70% of working age women in the workforce, the two-earner household has changed parenting forever. Two jobs and two careers upends the dynamics of past generations of raising children. Higher divorce rates, increased medication and slower teen social development skills are all coincidental attributes recognized throughout the USA (and much of the world) as a result of these factors.

So, what is a society to do to address this relatively new phenomenon?  The knee jerk reaction has been for colleges to assume this training role as part of career services. Not only is this not their role, but there is no training (or financing) for this. To expect a "twenty something" tutor or a full-time professor to substitute for a parent is not applicable and professors have training and expertise in completely different specializations.  Parents must recognize this cannot be vacated earlier in a child's life and just because of college cost pushed onto the college agenda. Parenting is teaching these skills. If there is a shortfall in these skills for employers, then responsibility is for parents  to find adequate and focused training and development of life skills. If colleges are to assume this responsibility, then the corresponding financial resources and expertise becomes a new responsibility as well as a definable value. Colleges should help but with dedicated and defined resources.

Parents are increasingly vacating the role as parents. There is not enough time with two careers. There are more responsibilities of everyone in two earner households. It is easier to cajole, be a friend to a child and not discipline them. Having defined family time while splitting the roles of everything from transportation to flexible work hours is much more complicated with dual careers. But let's not kid ourselves. Parenting is not being a child's best friend. It is not simply cuddling and giving out participation trophies. It is the little lessons of life that are decreasingly being taught as the role of parents evolves and the legacy definition vacated.  Don't expect a new generation to be the same when their role models are different and the very structure of their upbringing dependent on new factors. Colleges need to rethink their role as the new-found providers of Life Skill training and if they are providers the role needs to be defined and funded as well as measurable. Employers need to step up as well.  The expectations of parents and students needs to consider that if the life skill attributes they desire and employers value are to be taught they need to be the providers. Send us your comments. We love the sharing of views.

For All Parents to See - You Are Not Alone

Recently I was introduced to a video that every parent of a high school or college recent graduate has to watch.  Click here to watch Simon Sinek nails it. If you think your child lacks patience or is maybe confused with their future, then you need to have the 15-minute attention span to watch this. Even better you need to pass it on to.... well maybe a friend or relative.

Like past generations, many adults when looking at the next generation roll their eyes and mumble "these kids nowadays". I heard my parents say it. How about "nobody ever taught us how to be parents". That is simply not true. Our parents gave us a shining example how to be parents. Most actually did some belly flops, but in general they did a pretty good job. Their technology challenge was the television and our time watching the "boob tube".  The major technology transformation was from three networks to four and even five.

The legitimization and acceptance of the television was either Walter Cronkite or watching Neil Armstrong step off the ladder. The current day legitimization of technology is the ability to "Google it". The difference is that once we could access Google in mobile form it had other unintended consequences. It allowed the world to come to us instead of us exploring further. Social media has amplified this paradigm change adding more content and dopamine. The addiction is changing our culture right in front of us.

Now parents are themselves becoming hooked. I see it at board meetings with the sneak peek at the phone. Parents are more distracted themselves today. The number of two earner households has tripled in a generation. Divorce rates are up 50%. Either consciously or not, we changed from our parents who had more defined roles and certainly seemed stricter. As a generation of parents changed, so did their children. Technology was a big influence but helicopter parenting has resulted in a change of outcomes. It certainly is not all parents that have hovered over children, but the proliferation of participation trophies and adjustments to repercussions of behavior is certainly prevalent.

If we want to understand our youth today, we should look at their adult role models for clues. Watch Simon's video. It is a start. Realizing our children have grown up differently means we must adjust and either help them in their life mission or accept many of their characteristics. At face value, more jobs before you are 30 may be a good thing. In most cases, it will mean less skill development and less pay for less productivity. Is that by design or by default of not preparing earlier for careers? We will continue to discover. Send me your comments.